sure i've dont a lot of things wrong, but you havent seen anything...

my belly is overlapping my pantline, just ate a turkey sandwhich..with full enjoyment
the clouds are coming in out of nowhere, well..its from the ocean ..but it showed up in a matter of an hour
im lookin forward to what tehy have to offer...and i hope they bring it fully
this time of year just puts something in me.
i love it.
just cold air, crisp and clean...where more clothing is needed to be comfortable is the way i kinda like it.
how the sun kinda shines on the land just puts me in a mood, this is my time to just soak in the water y aknow?..just stop, and notice whats going on around me, and not focus what could happen...cause those curiosities crash my train of thought enough already...so im not gonna invite them, even though they'll come on their own.

we got a tree yesterday which was awesome. I really appreciate her enthusiasm about holidays..its how excited i used to be when i was a little younger, its how i wished things were longer than they were. I wanna but im used to holidays just being another day..which it is..but all the accessories that go to em i kinda forgot how it felt. THe smell really brings out the season, really kinda calms ya down


the god damn sky is going haywire!..fuckin lovin it

we're going to the harbor tonight to see the lit up boats.
it'll be a nice sight to see what people do.
i couldnt really give a crap about the boats
its just the event that im going for and the chance to have a nice evening out with someone special with good surroundings going on reflecting the time of year we're in.
it gives me that warm feeling like when your cold and you drink that hot chocolate on the couch after a hot shower..watching something that reminds you of your child days.

what ever happend to wonder years? that show was fucking bagelbite fantastic!

i am afraid though of the apt catching on fire...but i guess it'll spiff of apt living just a little more

'are we gonna burn in our sleep tonight? i dont know, only one way to find out'


its a good lookin tree though.

dec 11th is...will be the 10th year of my dad being gone.
its crazy, i cant remember him really..only little pictures i used to look at of him all the time after he died, tahts the only thing i remember
i need a context to it...but its kinda difficult.
i know the noises, the voices vaugely..but, i dont see him in my memory
i dont know, i dont know if im making him proud...it just would of been coool to see what he would have had to say about the things i wanted to ask him.
he died when i was 12..right before teen years, it would of been rad to see how he and i would have mingled through those ups and down years. To have a comfortable feeling to " go to dad" about it...im thankful for my mom, she held it down..but we were all affected during those years, it was mainly all of us just trying to figure out how we were doing ourselves...those years just adjusting to the consequences, i just wonder of course, what would have been different. who would i have been with the influence of my dad?
the only time i remember him is him being in and out of the hospital all the time, since i can remember he was always sick after the stroke..i remember coming home when it happened from school, he told my mom he needed to go to the hospital cause he just felt extrememly odd and unwell, from then on there, it was always being bed rested, using a walker, wheelchair and hospital beds.
obviously i think about this stuff..but living is comfortable enough, most of the time i forget about the day, not about him...but it ends up passing by and the next thing i know its the 12th.
sooner or later i wanna go see his grave, but im not completely sure yet.